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‭ ‬They looked like school lunches.‭ "‬What are you doing, ‭ ‬Helen, ‭ ‬sending us back to school‭?" ‬I asked, ‭ ‬laughing.‎"‏It was Jack's idea.‭ ‬I am making brown paper bag breakfasts and taking them to the job sites around town.‭ ‬I have even been invited to stop outside some of the businesses so their employees can run out.‭ ‬Everything in the bag can be microwaved, ‭ ‬or is almost as good cold.‭" ‬She sorted through them and came up with one that had a red star stamped on it.‭ "‬This one is yours, ‭ ‬Maxine.‭" Is it different, ‎" ‏I asked.‎"‏It's my deluxe for special clients, ‭" ‬she answered.‎"‏Oh, ‭ ‬I'm special‭?" ‬Damn I am having a good day, ‭ ‬I thought.‎"‏Of course, ‭ ‬you are.‭ ‬You found my granddaughter and you brought love into my life.‭" Skeeter‎?" Skeeter, ‎ ‏Jack, ‭ ‬and his family.‭ ‬That's why I wanted to see you.‭ ‬Jack has asked me out on a date.‭ ‬I came to ask you what I should do.‭" Okay, ‎ ‏Honey, ‭ ‬here is my advice.‭ ‬Screw his eyes out.‭" ‬We both. You see, there's another personal detail you need to understand I'm a man-hating lesbian. Even my therapist says so. Most lesbians aren't man-hating, I know, but I'm the exception that proves the rule."I sat down, sweating, hoping this was all some bizarre hoax. "Many individuals will be naturally immune." I know that, Dr. Ellenbogen. That's why I've released seventeen different strains. I think that should cover all the bases, don't you?" Why are you telling me this?" My work is done. It's too late for you to do anything about it now. You may as well begin adjusting as soon as possible. If you doubt me, why don't you have a CAT scan done of your abdomen? You'll find a small cavity shaped like an upside-down pear. It's your uterus, waiting for your penis to grow inward to a vagina and connect to it. I hope you enjoy it! Have a beautiful day, Dr. Ellenbogen."2015 A.D."Remember to wiggle the brush back and forth as you stroke upward," prompted my wife, Arielle."Thanks", I.
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